Un-lost in La Union

That morning I realized what I should do

It was a moment of impulsiveness again. I was walking home at 1am when the idea of going to La Union hit me out of nowhere. There was no trigger aside from my familiar forlorn. There was no rationalization apart from I could possibly catch the sunrise. But there was just enough sanity that I did not jump on a bus then and there and allowed for at least a day to let the thought sink in instead.

A full day, half a bucket of beer, and a bitter comment later, I finally got myself to the famed San Juan surfing beach. It wasn't the nicest of my rides and the smoothest of my decisions but arriving was definitely a pleasant relief. With no actual plans for being in La Union, I defaulted to just being there. I found a comfortable spot on the beach and watched how the place moves and breathes as I waited for the sunset.

The following day, I still defaulted to doing nothing. I walked along to the other side of the beach until I found an empty shade and sat under it. It was a weekday morning and the beach was mostly vacant. I squeezed myself onto the two bamboo poles so that I could uncomfortably lie down on the make-shift seats and then I indulged in my thoughts and reveries.

It didn't take long for me to spring back up again and take out a pen and paper. The normality and obviousness of the idea surprised me and I wondered why I didn't thought of it sooner. It was so common sense! It was so appropriate! And it felt so near! A hostel on a beach facing the sunset that would also be my home and income generator. Why not?

I started scribbling down the idea like I've had it for years. I'll do this and this and this. I'll put it on a beach facing the west that is still reasonably accessible from Manila. I'll apply what I've learned from my travels and will get feedback from fellow travellers. I'll scout for land soon and target to have it up by the next year or so. It was exciting and my brain was on overdrive again.

I looked up at the ocean once more and smiled to myself and to the world. I finally have (sort of) a plan. :)

Dreamland Intoxication

There's just some days when waking up from a reverie seem too unfounded a task. And indulging in daydreams present a more practical occupation instead. I know this is in the least bit advisable, especially in this dog-eat-dog reality. But sometimes I just can't help but let go of my eternally governmental self and set free my inhibited reckless self. So I positioned myself in a dream-forgiving stance, stared out the window onto the happening street, and let myself be consumed with unlikely visions of my personal paradise  -- as I willingly enter the daydreamer's world.

As hours went by unnoticed, and as chats coursed in and out of my consciousness, I remained a willing prisoner of my fantasies -- feeling limitless and heeding no importance to the day's demands. I travelled to Bangkok and watched the sunset in Langkawi. I wore trendy clothes in Tokyo and made friends with fellow travellers in Kyoto. I put up a comfortable hostel and spent my days lounging in the sand. I carried my world everywhere and carried myself with poise and confidence. It was intoxicating. It was addicting. It was everything but unpleasant.

And then, feeling satisfied with the frolic of my imagination, I slowly pulled back and woke up to my current reality. Although my present isn't that unpleasant, it, no doubt, doesn't stand a hair's chance on my dreamy future. But it's real and it's here and it's what I can cherish now. But maybe someday I'll turn those dreams into reality and it will be a million times better. But until then, I'll be slipping in and out of the world only I know of -- waiting, gathering until enough courage beams in.